Well, not quite! There is many a Friday afternoon when I just don’t fancy a delicious ale. Shock horror you may think to yourself. Well let me explain.
Discovering the best London pubs is not a full-time job (oh, how we wish it was.) Yes friends, we both have to work to pay boring things like mortgages. The London Pub Crawl Company is our thin veneer between desire and the real world.
Finding the best 200 pubs out of the 7,000 in our great city is a job, but sadly one my bank manager suggests will “not pay your bills young man”
Hmmn he has a point, condecending as it may be!
So yes, we devout pub explorers work for a living and my job often pulls me away from London and its top pubs. So here I am, antipodean at the moment in a country full of rascals, criminals and people who swear quite profoundly that even Ronnie and Reggie may blush. As good as life here can be, there is one vital ingredient missing – decent beer.
Now don’t get me wrong, it’s not all shit – just a very high proportion of it, which does not help my Friday afternoon relaxation techniques. So the answer? A nice gin and tonic. Thankfully they don’t make gin in Australia, so it’s a pretty hard drink to bugger-up (as they say here.)
So, the beer, as I know you are dying to know. If you are a lager drinker you are actually in for a treat as that is predominantly the beer style here. You will know Fosters from those “throw another shrimp on the barby” adverts. But most Aussies go for VB (Victoria Bitter) or the local State beer. Yep, like us they are poroachial and tend to take the mick out of people living in other states, which reminds me of a joke:
A West Australian, New South Welshman and a Victorian stumble upon an old lamp washed up on the beach. After giving the lamp a rub, out pops a Genie declaring they may have one wish each.
The New South Welshman asks:
“Can you build me a 50m wall along the State border between New South Wales and Victoria?’
“It is done” the Genie replies.
Smugly he sits back as the Victorian asks, “that wall, can you take it all the way around our State and keep all those buggers out?”
“It is done” the Genie replies. Very smugly the Victorian sits back thinking how well he has done.
The West Australian asks “that wall, can you fill it with water?”